Matt & I just got back from a marriage conference. It was good, to say the least. I'm not even sure I should write about it yet, because so many things are still soaking in. It may take my whole life for some of it to penetrate my hardened heart, but some things are seeping in as I write these very words. That I'm able to say that with truth, is a gift from Jesus. And to Him, for that... I'm so grateful.
He seems to be taking Matt & me on a wild and beautiful journey through our marriage. I use those words because they're just true. It has been a wild year relationship-wise for us. Wild like a tornado at times. Furious like a raging, powerful river at times. Ebbing and flowing unpredictably. Beautiful in a the way of a child's face on Christmas morning when surprise gifts, so undeserved, are given so freely. And when we least expect it, it's like a wild flower planted by God in a secret place...revealed in a burst of beautiful color in the middle of an ordinary field, purely for our own pleasure. A sweet reminder and reassurance from Him that He has not forgotten us.
Those are just a FEW examples of what my marriage has often felt like in the recent months. Last night and today I saw a glimpse of God in the middle of it all. All the ups and downs. Keeping me alive and calling me to trust His goodness. Exposing my inability to get it right, so I turn from myself to Him.
I wish I could give you every detail of what I learned. It was just too big. If you're interested, however, I would encourage you to go to the Red Mountain Church website and listen to an audio teaching of Gordon Bals. He's done marriage conferences there too and they're on the site. It would be worth your time, I promise.
I rest tonight feeling encouraged. Not despising the day of small things. A string of small victories together produces change. God is changing me still...
God promises alot, but often delivers slowly.
He is the lifter of my countenance.
My marriage is a gift from Him. A very detailed gift that came without a receipt, and clearly without an instruction manual. One that is getting more and more appreciated and loved as I look deeper into the heart of the gift. The heart of my husband. The heart of God.
Ooooo...to deep. Gotta go.
Saturday, February 24, 2007
Polishing the Old Ball-n-Chain
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13 comments:
marriage is the greatest adventure of them all. it takes you deep inside yourself, into your mate's heart, and deep in to the very heart of God. it is the everyday living picture of God's thoughts toward us, His bride.
Yay girly! I am so glad you guys got to spend some time with such an amazing teacher. I love you and Matt! I have always been able to see God's hand in putting you two together and I am excited to see all the many ways He will continue to use you in others lives (and in each others). Ha, you know what I just thought of? If we are like iron sharpening iron...maybe we sharpen each other sometimes with a little sword fighting.
That's so great Abbey - thanks for sharing freely. A dear friend of mine sees Gordon often, and has benefited so much from his wise counseling and godly advice. I'm glad ya'll were able to be ministered to, by him.
Hey- reminder..friday, 7...and..check out my new entry on my blog!
Why do you hate me?
Because you won't pick me up tonight at 5pm, drop me off, fart around for an hour or so,and then come pick me back up and take me to the book store and buy me coffee and girly talk until closing and then drop me off at home.
Hee...hee...hee...
Maybe if you blog I will.
Promise?
Yes. kind of like...I'll trade you some cupcake liners for a vacume cleaner. lol Seriously, I will do all those things but pick you up at 5:00 only because Nick won't be home yet. I will call him to make sure he gets home at a regular time though and I'll miss American noodle for you. SO....now...Why do you hate me?
Because Nicky Nicky Nicky Nicky Bernstein won't get home in time.
Why does he hate me?
Does he hate me today? Does he hate me tomorrow? Does he hate me for all the things I didn't do for him?
Oh, and Thanks for the cupcake liners. They worked just fine by the way. Sorry I gave you a broken vac. Next time I was wondering if you wanted to trade some powdered sugar for a broken dishwasher.
And just for you...I'll tape Oodle and we can watch it if you want to...
Yes, he hates you so he can finally see whats good for him.
Ha! We're so funny! Actually, that hurts my teeny-tiny feelings. Nick should come home extra early to make it up to me.
That's just like you to not hold up your end of the bargain. I guess it really was like "i'll trade you a vacume for some cupcake liners" just joking you have to blog when the mood hits you.
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